Terrific article, great questions, and real life conundrum. Covid saved me from the wedding dilemma. Mama was living with me and had dementia. She wanted to go to her grandson's wedding. Insisted on going to the wedding. But Covid made gatherings impossible and illegal. It was in the early part of the pandemic.

We put on our masks, went shopping in a nearly-deserted store, bought her a fancy new dress, then dressed up and watched the wedding on live stream. Mama acted as if she were truly there and it was a precious time. I buried her in that dress a year and a half later.